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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28958742">back's been breaking (from this heavy heart)</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/theriveroflight/pseuds/theriveroflight'>theriveroflight</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>From Under the Eiffel Tower: Spin the Record [6]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Miraculous Ladybug</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Based on a Fall Out Boy Song, F/M, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Time Travel, Unhealthy Relationships, rip adrigami</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 06:13:38</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,541</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28958742</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/theriveroflight/pseuds/theriveroflight</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <em>We're the kids that feel like dead ends...</em>
</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir &amp; Alix Kubdel, Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir/Kagami Tsurugi, Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir/Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug, Alya Césaire &amp; Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>From Under the Eiffel Tower: Spin the Record [6]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/2015888</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>14</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>back's been breaking (from this heavy heart)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Title and summary from...okay, fine: "I've Got a Dark Alley and a Bad Idea that Says You Should Shut Your Mouth" by Fall Out Boy.</p>
<p>(Thank goodness I didn't choose Take This To Your Grave, the long titles are in fact worse.)</p>
<p>The much anticipated sequel to "make up for the silence". This time we get a peek into Adrien's head!</p>
<p>Thanks to Khanofallorcs for beta reading.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>“Hey, Chat, I have something important that I want to tell you. I love you.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It’s more direct than Ladybug normally is — but Ladybug’s been acting different lately. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Um.” He blushes. This is what he wanted, isn’t it?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>For Ladybug to just love him back. Love him in the way he wants her to.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>But it’s a horrible idea to be with Ladybug anyways.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What…kind of love?” he asks, cautious. She might mean it as a friend, which would make sense considering their track record.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I want to be your girlfriend.” The honesty of it shocks him.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m…sorry, but I’m already dating someone.” He closes his eyes. “I’m spoken for, already.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>You took too long to love me, </span>
  </em>
  <span>he thinks. </span>
  <em>
    <span>And now I can’t love you in return without being unnecessarily awful to her.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Ladybug looks a little shocked. “I…Chat.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I found someone else. Because it took you too long to fall for me, or realize your feelings, or whatever was stopping you before.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Ladybug pauses to ponder that a bit. “I was too blind to see that I’ve loved you for longer than I cared to admit to myself.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>How he wishes he could accept her love. Accept the love that he’s always wanted from her.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>But he can’t.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>But he </span>
  <em>
    <span>shouldn’t </span>
  </em>
  <span>even be thinking that.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He shouldn’t want to.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It’s a kind of cheating, isn’t it? To feel love for someone else when you’re with someone?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>If he never acts on it, is it still cheating?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Like I said, I’m sorry, but I have a girlfriend now. I can’t just…abandon her.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You’re dating someone as Chat Noir?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He shakes his head. “Of course not. No one knows. I’ve been careful to not let </span>
  <em>
    <span>anyone </span>
  </em>
  <span>know, not after you took Marinette’s Miraculous.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Ladybug looks a little shocked. That…why would she be shocked?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“So,” she whispers, “return when you’re ready. I’ll be waiting.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She blows him a kiss. He blushes a little.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The patrol ends up not actually having any </span>
  <em>
    <span>patrolling.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Because they just go home from there.</span>
</p>
<hr/>
<p>
  <span>Adrien’s never been more confused. Ladybug’s changed a lot in a short period of time — he doesn’t know who she is outside of the mask, so he can’t see if there’s anything else there, but…well, he can do a little investigating.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Marinette is more relaxed, surprisingly. She asks him to help her out with Luka, because they’re supposed to be bros, yeah? So he does. He smiles, and tries not to think about why it hurts so much to help her.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>And his relationship with Kagami is going well. He’s lucky that it is, because he sacrificed Ladybug to stay with Kagami — not that it was much of a choice. He would have stayed with Kagami no matter what, because when he became her boyfriend there was a promise implicit in that (devotion, honesty, </span>
  <em>
    <span>fidelity—)</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>And he wanted to keep it.</span>
  <em>
    
  </em>
</p>
<hr/>
<p>
  <span>Ladybug continues to act strangely. The frequency of akuma attacks is about the same, nothing notable, but she explains her plans as though he’s </span>
  <em>
    <span>naive </span>
  </em>
  <span>and doesn’t understand her well enough.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>As though they haven’t been partners for going on a year now. As though they haven’t gone through hell and come out on the other side. As though they weren’t </span>
  <em>
    <span>partners, </span>
  </em>
  <span>but he was underneath her.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It isn’t right.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It isn’t right.</span>
</p>
<hr/>
<p>
  <span>“The one I was in love with before,” he says, “confessed her love to me the other day.” Open communication with Kagami. It’s the best way to keep their relationship alive.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m surprised she did,” Kagami replies.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah. Me too. I told her that I was in a relationship. She…took it alright? I don’t really know how to phrase how she took it. But I wanted to inform you — not because I intend on breaking up with you, but because I just…think you have the right to know. I think she’ll be continuing to pursue me. I don’t know.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Then what </span>
  <em>
    <span>was </span>
  </em>
  <span>the point, Adrien?” Kagami asks scathingly. “If you’re not going to break up with me, and you don’t reciprocate her interest, what is the point?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Adrien freezes. “Like I said, I don’t know.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She kisses him softly. </span>
</p>
<hr/>
<p>
  <span>A letter is posted to the Ladyblog. It isn’t signed anything except B/A, but he knows exactly who it’s from.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Alix.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He can’t approach her as Adrien — that would be </span>
  <em>
    <span>strange, </span>
  </em>
  <span>but he could find her as Chat Noir. And if she can aid him in his investigation into what changed about Ladybug, well…</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Well, he should contact her.</span>
</p>
<hr/>
<p>
  <span>“So, Alix, what do you know?” he asks, as she skates around a corner in the hallway. She almost bumps into him, because she’s taking the corner tight and he’s leaning against the wall in a way that’s meant to be casual, but might not come across as such.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Are you asking about Ladybug?” she asks. “Come on, catboy, we’re going somewhere the cameras won’t overhear us.” Alix drags him towards the street.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Alright, tell me what’s going on,” she says.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I could say the same to you,” he answers. “You know more than I do on Ladybug. I looked for you because I know you left that note. And you said that you wanted to contact someone that </span>
  <em>
    <span>was </span>
  </em>
  <span>suspicious of Ladybug…and she’s been acting strangely as of late. I don’t know…”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You’re right. I do know more than you. She came to me a couple weeks ago.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“And you’re only speaking up now?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I didn’t know if you’d…I know you love her, Chat, and I wasn’t sure if you’d fall under her </span>
  <em>
    <span>thrall </span>
  </em>
  <span>or not. But she came to me, because she wanted timeline help.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>His mind is racing. Why would Ladybug want help with time travel…unless…</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“This Ladybug time traveled.” Alix nods.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“She didn’t mean to be…stranded? I suppose that’s the right word. But she threatened me. She’s not the same Ladybug, and I don’t know who the </span>
  <em>
    <span>actual </span>
  </em>
  <span>Ladybug is, but we need to figure it out. We need to find out who. Ladybug says that she got the other one ‘out of the way.’ I don’t know what that means. She probably found her other self and talked to her. But we need to find </span>
  <em>
    <span>some </span>
  </em>
  <span>way to send her back.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Regular Ladybug has all of the Miraculous. And I presume that the version we’re facing has her own version of the Rabbit.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I see,” Alix mutters. “We should stay in contact. I know your baton has a phone function, can you save contacts?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No, but if I text you, it’ll be in my history.” Alix grabs her phone and dictates her number to him. He sends her a little kitty cat emoji, because he’s nothing if not cliche.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Alright. I’ll get you whatever else I can remember as soon as I can.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He nods. “And if I get any new developments, well, I’ll let you know.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>They break away from each other as Alix skates away and Chat vaults up.</span>
</p>
<hr/>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>I have a monumentally horrible idea, </span>
  </em>
  <span>he texts Alix.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>what</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>I tell Ladybug I broke up with my gf, start spy-dating her, and try and find a way to shove her back where she came from.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>that’s awful, break up with your gf 4 real b4 you start. at least b honest</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>My feelings for Ladybug are complicated but I don’t want to lose her.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>there’s a thing called ‘staying friends’</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>I will give it a try, I suppose.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>now that’s what i like 2 hear</span>
  </em>
</p>
<hr/>
<p>
  <span>“I’ve evaluated our conversation since we last talked,” Kagami says, “and I think we should break up. I just never thought you really got over that girl, and I want to give you the chance to go with her if you want her now.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>That’s…perfect. But Adrien doesn’t want to put that into words — that’s not a good thing, and he doesn’t </span>
  <em>
    <span>really </span>
  </em>
  <span>want this, but it’s an opportunity that he must take in order to send her back.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Okay,” he answers, and he doesn’t have to fake heartbreak. “Are we…going to try and be friends?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I think that would be the optimal outcome, yes, but that may be difficult for a bit.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m willing to put in the work,” he says. “I want us to be friends.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>And that’s the truth, too.</span>
</p>
<hr/>
<p>
  <span>The next patrol comes with great trepidation. No akumas, just…silence.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I broke up with her,” he says in lieu of a greeting.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She steps closer to him. “So you’re ready to be with me instead?” Her caress feels…feels awful. It makes him want to shake. He controls himself — modeling has taught him how to suppress his emotions, so there’s one good thing.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He nods. “You’re the only one for me now.” The lie is similar enough to the truths he’s confessed before, so it doesn’t feel as slippery.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Good.” She leans in for a kiss, closing her eyes. His blow open with shock, but he thinks he can hear the sound of a camera shutter snapping.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Oh no.</span>
</p>
<hr/>
<p>
  <span>“Hey, girl,” Adrien overhears Alya say to Marinette before class, “get a load of this.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He peeks to see that the picture of them kissing has wound up on the Ladyblog.</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>To be continued...in track 9.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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